The Reality Of My Prayer

The Reality Of My Prayer

I am constantly praying to God. I’m already reciting my prayer in the morning when I wake up. I try to be open with God. I admit my fears. I talk to him about my wrongs. I always talk to him about my dreams. Im very thankful that God is always interested in me. The things I care about are his priority and I find that very comforting to know.

 

As the day progresses, I continue to pray to God. I go about my day. I keep busy at work. I try to get as much done as I possibly can in one day. This is easy when i’m feeling productive. As the day goes by, my prayer fades in and out. Keeping my prayer in constant motion helps. It prevents me from entering a routine and repeating the same thing. It helps keep my prayer fresh and true.

 

I feel my prayer lacks a lot of depth. It feels shallow at times. My prayer seems to be mostly about me. If I were to really take a moment to analyze my prayer, I know I would find many flaws. The one that stands out the most to me is that I don’t worship God. My prayer is not pleasant. I always take the time to thank God and try acknowledge all that he does for me. I don’t do it enough. I can go the whole day ranting about the problems and crisis that consume my life. In my point of view, I feel like I am in an ocean with a raging storm. God has a divine perspective. There are things that might be insignificant to him.

 

I really appreciate how patient God is with me. He must be tired of hearing me complain everyday. This is where my prayer needs work. I need to change perspectives. I need to look at my life the way God sees it. I need to pray with my spirit and not with words. God already knows that I am struggling. God is already aware that I am hurting. God is already planning to bless me. Crisis is necessary. It is used to shape me. It is a method of building my character. God wants to see if I have faith in him. God wants to know if I am able to worship even if the waves are crashing into me.

 

I have to admit that I have been a disappointment. The waves knocked me over. At one point, I just wanted to accept this state of defeat. I have no control over the mishaps that occur in my life. What could I possibly do to change my life? I was ok with not being ok. Looking at my life falling into pieces made me very uncomfortable. I could feel those sharp edges pushing me around. I couldn’t bear the reality of my life. I was miserable and I couldn’t accept that anymore.

 

I cried out to God. I wept so many times. I stayed up at night waiting for God to come through. I was not expecting God to do anything. I figured he had other plans for me. God was already ahead of me. The events that have happened in my live have been to push me out of my comfort zone. They were there not as obstacles, but as steps to help me climb out of my acceptance of defeat. I was free through pain, hurt and discomfort. I don’t want to take any steps backwards. Everyday I wake up with the mindset of advancing. I want to see the promises of God come through. I am able to worship because I know that God did not cut corners. He took his time with me. He did his part and placed motivation where I saw discouragement. God has given me a new perspective.

 

Lord, I come before you to worship you. I will not let the crisis in my life influence me. You did not call me to live a life of disappointment. You have far greater plans for me. I give you all that I am. Take my heart and mend the wounds. Heal the scars that cover me. Remove the pain and replace it with your presence. I pray to you today with confidence. I know that you will take care of my needs. You hold on to me and do not let go. You lift me high where no pain could ever reach me. I praise you for the things that you have done in my life. I can be still because I know that you have more for me. Amen.

 

Jeremiah 29:12

 

“Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.”

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Florentino Castellanos
Florentino Castellanos 63 posts

Florentino Castellanos, or Tino for short, is the Founder of The Heart Of Worship Project. Florentino is a self taught musician since the age of 7. Florentino has been serving as a worship leader for over 5 years. Florentino graduated from Musicians Institute, Hollywood with a certificate in Audio Engineering. Florentino's dream is to build up Churches, Leaders and Creatives. Florentino is known for having an incredible amount of Faith in God.

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